The Brunching Shuttlecocks Features

Godwin has a law. Moore has a law. Murphy, of course, has a law. Theodore Sturgeon has a law and he was just being a smartass. It seems to me that if there's any justice in this world I should have a law too. And just to hedge my bets, I'm going to give the world a choice. Here's the first round of potentional Sjöberg's Laws.

Sjöberg's Law of Cinematic Innacurracy

Movies get everything wrong. Hacking-based movies are laughable to hackers, military-based movies are laughable to members of the armed forces, and Indiana Jones movies are laughable to archeologists.

Sjöberg's Law of Lexical Drift

Sexual meanings of words and phrases will eventually overshadow other possible meanings: e.g. "gay," "cum," "Dick/dick," "turn me on." More explicitly sexual meanings of words and phrases will eventually overshadow subtler sexual meanings, e.g. "make love."

Sjöberg's Law of Public Cliquishness

Any unmoderated public discussion space, no matter what the ostensible subject, will eventually attract a clique of contributors who will use the space primarily to discuss their personal lives and trade in-jokes. In addition, it will attract at least one regular contributor who will make it his or her goal to harass and harangue the other regulars.

Sjöberg's Law of Usenet Filtering

If you ignore any Usenet posting which has five or more sentences in all caps, is crossposted to five or more newsgroups, or has five or more levels of quoting, the result is lossless compression of information.

Sjöberg's Law of Advanced Usenet Filtering

If you read a newsgroup for a week and then never read it again, the result will be lossy but extremely efficient compression of information.

More by Lore Sjöberg Back to The Shuttlecocks Homepage