These are little cookie-like sticks dipped in chocolate. Very straightforward, and more addictive than "Ben and Jerry's Crack N' Tobacco Crunch." They also have Melon Pocky, Coconut Pocky, Giant Pocky, some sort of crunchy Pocky which I think has toffee or something, and "Pocky for Men." I'm not sure if those last ones have testosterone in them or just look good with a suit and tie, but there's a certain macho appeal to eating a man's chocolate-covered cookie snack. A+

Certainly there's no dearth of food shaped like other food in Western culture -- I had a Jell-O salad shaped like a pig just last week -- but Everyburger deserves big handclaps for attention to detail. The darned things look unnervingly like hamburgers. The chocolate "meat" is precisely the correct color, and the cookie "bun" actually has miniscule "sesame seeds." If Goldfish Crackers had that much devotion to verisimilitude, they'd all have little glazed eyes staring helplessly up at you. And who wouldn't enjoy that? A

Seasoned Cuttlefish Crackers
I don't want to ever hear you say I never ate seasoned cuttlefish crackers for you. They're even shaped like cuttlefish, although I must admit I haven't spent enough time around cuttlefish to tell how precise the likeness is. If you've ever eaten shrimp chips, they taste kind of like those. If you've never eaten shrimp chips, you're probably not going to want to start at this late stage of the game. C-

Glico Something or Other
More candy. I picked this one up because it had both a triumphant athlete and a wooden toy duck on the box. Unable to drum up the faintest connection between the two, I bought it. This is a common experience with me and Japanese candy. Anyhow, the wooden toy duck is because the box contains a wooden toy duck, and the triumphant athlete is because the packaging designer was insane. The box also contains weird squishy strawberry candy, kind of like gummi candy with no will to live. There's just no sports connection whatsoever. C

Meiji, um, Things
I don't know what these are, except that they're vaguely reminiscent of Fun-Yuns. Judging from the packaging, I had assumed they would taste like a happy frog, a hungry little guy with a beard, or a bowl of soup. Upon prying open the bag, however, I was greeted with the familiar aroma of curry and relief. These are quite tasty! They're little crunchy curry units! I can dig it! B

Hello Kitty Lips Candy
They don't taste a damn thing like Hello Kitty lips. D